Did you know that if you put your right hand in the wrong place on your keyboard, the title of this post is, “Ot’s a Bppl goveawau!” I have nothing against bppl goveawaus, but that is not at all what this is and I don’t want you to be disappointed. No bppls are goveawaus in this post. Now, back to the story…
There are times in our lives when it has to be done. There are days that demand it. Is the time right? Is this the right venue? Can I even do this?
These are the things that cross our minds when it’s time. Time for what? Time to bitch.
There. I said it.
I’m not a total Pollyanna, but I try not to be a whiner. But for crying out loud, if there weren’t so damn many rude people in this world, my non-whininess would be much more convincing.
Fortunately, there’s a book out there for people like me. People who don’t want to necessarily blurt out the blue-streak of insults and profanities and accusations of illegitimacy to those who deserve it. The book is called, “How To Get A Frontal Lobotomy For Cheap So You Can Deal With The Assholes Around You.” No, wait, that’s not it. Actually, the book I’m talking about is called, “Things to Bitch About.“ But wait! I know, you’re like, “Oh yeah, like I need a list.” No, in fact you DON’T need a list! What you need is a place to vent all of your bitching, a place where you can say what you feel and hopefully keep your nose intact! And that place is “Things to Bitch About”! For instance, there is a page dedicated to Bullies. Everybody knows that you can’t bitch about bullies TO bullies. Duh. But you can sure as heck bitch about them in the book — and you get an entire page to do it! (Actually, if I had a complaint, it’d be that the book needs more pages for “Bullies” and “Douchebags” but I guess I’ll just write really small.)
What? What’s that? You want that book? I have some good news for you! I’m giving one away! (But not my copy, oh hellz no!) Yup, leave a comment with your “Thing to Bitch About” topic (or your entire rant — you’re among friends). On Friday I’ll draw names and announce the lucky winner of the book!
Can’t wait till Friday? Must buy the book for your office mate, mother, sister, uncle, mailman, or bridezilla? You can order it from Amazon!
So, that’s it: comment, wait until Friday, possibly win book.
Meanwhile, thanks to Allegra Newman for my own copy of Things to Bitch About. Check out her blog here!